On Sunday as I was reflecting on our family’s situation, I had an impression that filled me with gratitude to my father. I was thinking about an experience I had had with Dad the day after we found out how widespread the cancer was. Dad and I were sitting in my parent’s living room. We had been silent for several minutes thinking about the situation at hand. I had a question for Dad but did not know how to ask it. I finally found the courage and said, “Dad, I don’t know what will happen with this, but I wanted to know how you felt about dying.” Without hesitation, Dad said, “I am at peace with my life, and if that is what is supposed to happen, I am OK with it.” I have thought about that answer several times every day since then.
It seems to me that when a person is told they may not have long to live, they have three choices of how to act. First, they can frantically start trying to figure out the purpose in life, trying to find God, and maybe do a lot of repenting. Second, they can wallow in self pity and constantly ask, “Why me?” Third, they are at peace with their life and they understand the plan of salvation so they are able to spend quality time with their family.
I really don’t know what the future holds, and I hope Dad is around for a long time. The impression that I received on Sunday was that, because Dad has lived an incredible life, and because he understands God’s plan, Dad can spend quality time with his family. Maybe his greatest gift to his family was the life he chose to live for the past 63 years. We have a father who is spending time and laughing with his family instead of worriedly trying to repair a damaged life.
I silently made a promise to my family on Sunday that I would live that kind of a life. If this situation was ever presented to me, I would be able to give my family the same amazing gift my father has given me.
What a beautiful thing to read this morning! Thank you for sharing this, Teague. I read this early this a.m. and have had time to ponder it since then. After taking my son to school, and reading it again, I also realize that not only is that the greatest gift that Gary could bestow on his family, but it's also the greatest gift he could give to himself.
ReplyDeleteTo be able to face the next step in our journey here on earth with peace and courage is a remarkable gift to our own selves. To be ready to meet our Savior with joy, wow, that is really something to be envied and admired.
We give this gift to ourselves by living an exemplary life, as Gary does.
What joy and peace that Gary has choice number three, that he can feel at peace whatever may come.
We will all come to that point in our lives, and the older I get, the more I reflect on this myself.
Am I ready? Have I given that great gift to myself and to my family? I'm not sure.
I hope not to have choice number one, and certainly hope I won't take choice number two. .
Thank you for sharing your thoughts today, Teague. I'm going to also strive to be a better person, because of Gary's example and because of the life he leads.
Raynee gave a beautiful testimony on Sunday. What a strong and amazing woman you are Raynee! You've also set a wonderful example to all the women in Imperial Ward and beyond. Your testimony has strengthened mine on many many occasions, and now, once again your courage and strength in the face of adversity is amazing. I admire you so much.
You said in your testimony that you are not fearful. You have no fear in what lies ahead, only joy.
What a great gift you give to Gary, what a wonderful gift to your children and to us all!
I could see the love you have for your children and for your dear Gary. It was wonderful to see. I don't know how you have the courage, maybe I need to work on being stronger so that I can one day have that kind of strength.
'If ye are prepared ... ye shall not fear'
How simple, yet how true.
I continue to pray for you all. May Heavenly Father bless you and keep you and lift you.
Love always
Sally
Teague,
ReplyDeleteAgain, another beautiful tribute and a well-deserved one.
I have always been in awe by your parents' love for each other. It's a given that these two people would love their children. But to have a constant love affair with your spouse is, sadly, so rare, and they have it. This is an amazing legacy from both your parents.
I hope more than anything that Gary will be around for years to come, that he will beat this disease into remission. Yet the fact that he is at peace with whatever comes is another rarity. You said,
"Maybe his greatest gift to his family was the life he chose to live for the past 63 years. We have a father who is spending time and laughing with his family instead of worriedly trying to repair a damaged life."
Would that all of us could say that about our own lives.
I have been given the gift within the last few months of a return of faith, something that went south for several years. My own belief now of a continued existence has brought me a joyful peace, one that Gary and Raynee never lost.
I look forward to perusing this blog daily. It's, I'm sure, as uplifting many people as it is to me.
My love and prayers are with you all...
Marti
Excellent observations, Teague! Life is not about the day or moment you die. It's about how you live! As Tevye says in Fiddler on the roof, "To life!" -Lisa M
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