The Perfect Sendoff!

The last few days have gone so quickly. We had no idea there was so much to do when getting ready for viewings and a funeral.

The viewing on Wednesday night was nothing short of amazing. Dad looked great and we were able to make the room look nice with a lot of memories of him.

Our family was so humbled and filled with gratitude as we saw hundreds of people take time out of their busy lives to pay their respects to Mom and Dad.  We felt badly the line was so long, but we wanted to talk for a few minutes with every person who came.  We could not believe how many people came that we knew from decades ago.  Many people seemed surprised that we actually turned out OK.  As we were leaving, the mortuary director told us that they had never had that many people at a viewing.

On Thursday we set up the church and started greeting people at about 10:00 and had the same experience.  Talking with people was the highlight of the two days for me.  At 11:45 the funeral director told us they had told the people in line that they could not see Gary and needed to go to the chapel.  We were so sad that we could not see everyone!

Tim (Dad’s brother) gave a beautiful family prayer and we slowly walked into the chapel.  All of us have cried so much over the last couple of weeks that we felt “cried out.” 

I think the funeral was just how Dad would have wanted it – upbeat and positive.  You have to understand that in our family there is a lot of joking with each other and each brother couldn’t pass up a good jab.  My mother has often said that a person needs a pretty healthy self esteem to be in this family.  The best part was when Cory finally came clean and admitted that HE was the one who wrecked the rental car in Kentucky.

The funniest moment of the funeral, however l was when the grandchildren stood up and sang Families Can Be Together Forever.  Jaxon (Cory’s son), Dawson (Kirk’s son), and Mason (Chris’ son) all started grabbing the microphone so they could sing in it.  Most people did not hear the music because everyone was laughing at the wannabe rock stars.  Mom later said that the microphone grabbing was the icing on the cake of the perfect funeral.

Rick (Alicia’s husband) opened the meeting with a touching prayer.  Rick and Dad have had a great relationship and Dad’s death has been as hard on him as it has the rest of us.  Jeff (Dad’s brother-in-law) did a great job of giving the life sketch and Brittani (Alicia’s daughter) played a very beautiful song on the piano.  After the four sons were finished, President Wood (Dad’s Stake President and friend) gave a great talk about the plan of salvation and what happens after we die.  At one point in President Woods’ talk he said that he knew that Dad had successfully finished everything he was supposed to in this life.  That was very comforting to me.  Scott Turner (Dad’s nephew) gave a great closing prayer.

The pall bearers were all of Dad’s sons (Kirk, Cory, Chris, and me), Rick, and the four oldest grandsons (Tyson, Zak, Nathan, and Braydan).  We carried the casket to the hearse and then drove to the mortuary.  It was very somber as we carried Dad to the plot.  Over the last several days the reality of Dad’s death has hit me at different times, but it was at this point that the finality of the situation started to sink in.  I performed the dedication of the grave.  Just before we left Kirk had several white doves that were released.  Then a few seconds later, Mom released a single white dove that joined the others and they flew off.  This was symbolizing Dad returning to his family.  The funny part was that the single dove flew around for a bit trying to find the others.  This was more symbolic than anyone realized because during his life, Dad was always lost.  Finally after watching the lone lost dove for a minute, Mom said, “that really is Gary because he is lost.”  Everyone burst out laughing.  All of the family members took a flower to remember Dad by and we went back to the church.

We want to thank all of the people who helped with the funeral and all of the kind women who had lunch waiting for us when we returned to the church.  The food was delicious and it was nice just to sit and not have any place to be.

Mom wanted me to write and tell everyone that she is humbled by the love people have shown her and the children during this difficult time.  She cannot believe how many people would come on such short notice to see her “sweet husband.”

The Viewing

The Funeral