Good morning!
As Teague mentioned last night, Dad had a pretty rough day. I was at the house with him for a while and he was in so much pain, he was having a hard time concentrating. He was very anxious and couldn't stop moving around in an attempt to find a comfortable position. He finally went to bed after a few bites of Jen's rice pudding.
Around 11:30PM he got up to "try" and go to the restroom and he lost his balance and fell into the bath tub. Mom jumped out of bed in a panic and helped him out of the tub scared out of her mind. It seems he is not hurt too bad, but Mom scolded him and said "Please Gary, PLEASE wake me up if you need something". Well at 3:00AM Mom heard the bath running and of course Dad didn't want to wake his love of his life. She jumped out of bed, ran into the bathroom totally confused because she has only seen Dad take a bath maybe once in their 43 years of marriage. Well there was my poor Dad, sitting in the tub with the water running, just hoping it would sooth some of the pain. As she told me this, my heart broke yet again. The thought of this strong, powerful man, sitting in a tub, 35-40 pounds lighter than normal, just praying that this would sooth his incredible pain... WOW!!!
After the bath, which didn't seem to help much at all, they got back in bed and he fell asleep for a little while. He was up at 7:00AM and had some success at something that the pain pills have made difficult for the past week. I'm sure you can figure out what I'm talking about, and I'm sure Dad isn't going to be happy that I put it in the blog. Sorry Dad, but we are happy for this victory!!!
Dad is VERY dehydrated and after yesterday's Doctor appointment, it has been decided to bring in a "in home nurse" to administer IV's and anything else he needs. We are relieved for this because taking him out is very difficult in the current state.
In closing, I would like to apologize for my negative email the other day. I typed that post barely able to see the keys on my keyboard through the tears that poured from my eyes. We are all trying to be as strong as possible and for the most part we are all doing wonderful. My Mom has assumed the roll that my Father has held all of our lives. My brothers and sister all have stepped up in ways that are amazing and continue to show strength and support that is second to none. However, I'm sure we all have our moments and I had one of those "moments" the other day. I am still VERY angry but I love God as much as I love my Father. I know God has a plan for this incredible man. I just wish that the plan included him here on earth with me/us....
I LOVE YOU FATHER!!!!
:( Hang in there...
ReplyDeleteBtw - We tend to lose our dignity with cancer (& child birth)... those "private matters' become open conversation. At times "they" are even included in our prayers for our loved ones. I remember having a very stern talk with my Heavenly Father one night and asking for: a cure, that my mom would beat cancer and stay on this earth, that she wouldn't be in pain, and that we could all get some sleep, but if not ... at least let her be able to go to the bathroom- for heaven's sake. (She would kill me for posting this too... - boy Kirk, we are most likely not going to be "favorite child" this week:))
We love you ALL!!!
I know our Father in Heaven understands when we feel angry and he cries with us for our pain. But he understands the bigger picture, I am confident of that. Life can be hard, but we get through it and Heavenly Father will always help us.
ReplyDeleteLove you all
Leslie M
I love all of you so very much, and continue to think about and pray for you often. I am grateful for this blog and the honest and tender way all of you share your feelings and thoughts about wonderful Uncle Gary...thank you for this gift to the rest of us.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Lezli
Renee and family,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your courageous fight. We are saddened at all you and your family are going through, but it is so clear in your posts how much your family loves each other and all that you are doing to help buoy each other up in this challenging time.
We will keep Gary and your entire family in our prayers and hope that this next week has some positive news.
All our love,
Lara and Greg Wright family
Do not feel bad for what you wrote. It is undestandable because of what you are going through. The important thing is not to lose your faith. God knows what you are feeling and he will help you to have peace, even though some days it could feel like we can't endure, he knows the way to support us.
ReplyDeleteThnki about the wonderful parents you have and the precious moments you have live with them and also that FAMILIES ARE FOREVER.
Angie
I feel incredibly blessed to be associated with the Bengtzen family by a wonderful & close friendship. Thank you so much for sharing your tender, heartfelt feelings with all of us. I know this cannot be easy but I think it's very cathardic. I can't tell you how many times a day Dave & I pray for your dad, mom and each of you. I believe in the power of prayer. It is so powerful and magnificent. Our Father in Heaven has a great plan for each of us. I know it's hard to watch a loved one suffer so much. Our Savior knows exactly what we are going through. He suffered for each of us.
ReplyDeleteWe love you all and pray that the Lord will ease Gary's pain and suffering. Our sincerest thoughts and prayers are with each of you. We love you Gary & Raynee. You are so precious to us!