Today we were supposed to have the appointment with the Oncologist and then Dad was going to begin his second round of chemo at 12:30. We ran into Jeff and Donna Thygesen and had a wonderful visit with them. How sad that we have to catch up with friends in an Oncologists office while two wonderful people battle this horrible disease.
Well unfortunately Dad's platelets are not high enough to do his chemo. I'm sure that is "bitter/sweet" for Dad after his last bout. We were anxious to get the second round behind us and it was very disheartening to hear that he isn't strong enough to get blasted again. Teague mentioned the trip that the family was planning on taking to Kentucky to see our family and the Dr suggested that we go right away, like this weekend. Mom asked what he meant exactly since I'm sure you could see how we all took that comment. The Dr said that this could be the best physical time for Dad because "we just don't know how he will respond to the next treatment". This may be his best chance for travel.
We asked about the liver test that was done last week and the results have not come back yet. We now know that there is little chance that this test will actually tell us anything new. However, in the rare chance that is does, the Doctors felt it was important to try... Hopefully we will have results by the next week appointment and it will give us a new way to fight!!
We explained to the Dr that yesterday was one of the worst days Dad has had regarding his pain. He was in so much pain that he could not even put full thoughts together. Mom really was struggling yesterday and this morning since this should be his "BEST" time (right before his next chemo) and yet it was one of the worst days she's seen. The Dr said overall, he wasn't too concerned about this because his body might be starving for more chemo, but agreed that we need to work hard to find the best balance of pain medications. He went on to say "What we have is a large boulder that is going down a hill. We are doing everything we can to slow this boulder down, but slowing it down is all we can do".
This made me VERY emotional. I knew this is the situation we are in, but to hear the Dr say this was like someone kicked me in the stomach, then in the heart and then in the head. I grabbed a tissue from my pocket, swallowed hard two or three times and tried to be strong for my Dad. Teague was much better at being strong then Mom and me, but talking with him afterwards, he had the same feeling with every word that hit our ears.
Dad continued to ask a couple of questions about things he had been experiencing. One of the questions was about some "blocks in his vision". As he explained in detail what he was experiencing, Mom jumped in and said "I had that exact thing happen to me during my chemo Gary. This is probably something very common, isn't Dr?",. The Dr replied "actually this is the first I have ever heard anything like this..." Teague and I started laughing out loud because obviously this is just a Bengtzen thing... At this point I needed a laugh desperately!
Dad needs to eat, drink, exercise, drink, eat, drink, rest, drink, eat, drink, drink, eat,drink, exercise, drink, eat... DO YOU HEAR ME FATHER??????
WE LOVE YOU DAD!!!!! (but I love you the mostest!)
I am so sorry you are having to deal with this ugly and awful disease. It seems to be one blow after another. Hang in there! Swallow hard... and then cry - it's okay to just cry!! It is a rotten deal and sometimes being mad and crying validates feelings!! :( We continue to pray. We love you all and think about you often. Keep fighting, Gary!!
ReplyDeleteWho in Jeff’s family is having treatment and for what?
ReplyDeleteJeff's wife, Donna.
ReplyDeleteHi Gary & Raynee,
ReplyDeleteWe are so sorry to hear that Gary is in a particularly rough spot today.
Has Gary become acquainted with the drink "Boost" by Nestle? Steve used this alot when he had no appetite during chemo and he was going down,down in weight every day. Steve really liked the chocolate flavor and he would use it for his beverage, but it has 250 cal. per 8 oz. which is much more than a 6 oz. yogurt at 170 calories. Google "boost drink" to see it, it is at the groc. store. The best thing we did when Steve was losing weight so much was I had to start counting calories of what he ate every day for 2 weeks until we got over the bad hump. You can look up anything on google and get a calorie count of it. Just google calorie counter and choose a free one, then start keeping a list of what Gary eats. We asked our dietician at the hospital how many calories Steve had to eat a day just to maintain his weight, then how many he needed to start gaining again. he finally realized he was well below the maintain-weight number each and every day. (I also had to incentivize him with money for those 2 weeks every time he met his daily quota of weight-gain calories because he had absolutely no physical desire for food.)You could have your family members do the looking up and cataloging the calorie counts; many of the things we eat we repeat over and over.
Well, our prayers are with you. We got both of your names back on the prayer roll of the temple now that Salt Lake has re-opened Mon.
Elder Keetch spoke so highly of both of you on Sun. to everyone in the audience. He told everyone to not allow themselves to "coast" or get into a "holding pattern" waiting for changes to be made in the YSA program. Everyone at the meeting seemed to be super-charged up. Charlene Holmsrom wanted you to know she wrote a long, long comment to you on this blog right when she first got our email telling her of Gary's cancer, but when she went to post it, it didn't post, it was lost. She'll try again. Larry Holmstrom had mouth and tongue cancer.
We love and admire you both so much-you're fighting a great fight!! love,Rick & Carolyn Evans
Hang in there Gary. We hope your trip back East is great.
ReplyDeleteDan Thunell